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Tag Archives: working mom

Comparing My Insides to Your Outsides.

successnotwhatyouseeI know I shouldn’t do it, but it’s like a really bad habit I can’t seem to break. This morning, my first thought was, “Is it time already?”  Yea, eventually I got to the gratitude that I get to spend another day with my son.  I get to feed him.  I get to appreciate his adorable smile and laugh.  But where I started out is, “Damn, I really wanted to keep sleeping.”

I recently joined a Facebook group for mama’s.  We talk about everything, and I found myself thinking I knew about each of them.  Ok, really, I think I know all about you.

In my mind you wake up 3 hours before your baby does.  You head to the gym with your hair and teeth brushed, wearing your newest adorable workout clothes where you are totally uplifted by your workout and the sight of your rock hard abs.  You do a little yoga  where you have a savasana that leaves you feeling totally tapped in and tuned to the divine.  This connection is the foundation for your bliss throughout the day.  Yep, all day long blissful and joyous is how I know you roll.

You come home and rejoice immediately when you hear your baby stirring because you missed her so. You just put the cloth diapers in the wash on the hot cycle so they have time to air dry in the sun because you are such a stand for the environment.  This is your day before 8am.  Do I need to go on?treehugger

Your strong ripped arms allow you to snuggle with your baby while you eat your healthy breakfast that you calmly waited to cook and eat until your little one had been nursed.  Maybe you even make breakfast for your significant other, too before they start his/her day.  With total joy of course.  You then put your baby down for tummy time which she delights in as you joyfully clean up from breakfast and begin to prep for dinner.

And on and on in your perfect joyousness.  Or at least when I am reading your posts on Facebook, this is how I assume it goes for you other mothers of the world.

The thing is, before I had an infant, I think I thought that was how it was going to go for me.  I didn’t anticipate having breast feeding issues.  I didn’t anticipate baby blues.  I didn’t anticipate an extra 10 minutes of sleep making the difference between functioning and crazy.  I didn’t anticipate my son would hate the stroller and exercise would feel like a long distant memory.

super momOk, it’s only been 4 months.  Maybe it’s ok I don’t have it all figured out yet?  I know what you experienced supermom’s are saying.  Hold on.  Keep breathing.  Trust.  It’s going to get better.  Laugh at yourself.  Make new friends.  Share.  Sleep when he sleeps.  But, is that really enough?  When I lay my head down at night, how do I feel like it’s enough?

How do you know you’ve done your best?  How do you acknowledge your progress, rather than searching for perfection?  And please tell me how you stopped comparing your insides to other’s outsides!